Today I made a banana walnut loaf. It tasted great but I destroyed its aesthetic when it only partially came out of the pan. I said to my wife that I could never be on Iron Chef because I can't even make a banana loaf. But the truth is I couldn't be on Iron Chef because I'm not a chef. Here's a list of other shows I couldn't be on:
-Iron Chef. I can't even cook an egg...or a banana loaf.
-Grey's Anatomy. There are way too many medical words to pronounce or in my case mispronouce. I could be an AWESOME silent nurse who holds charts in the corner though.
-American Idol. I can't sing well enough and I would cry if Simon was mean to me.
-So You Think You Can Dance? I wish I could dance but alas I can only air hump.
-The Bachelor. Duh! I'm a married and gay.
-And any show where I'd have to be quiet, starve on an island or talk politics with republicans.