Movie Review: THE GIFT

Psychic widow, Cate Blanchett, gives tarot readings to the local looney rednecks while her three boys long for their late Papi. Cate uses her cards to be a therapist to the abused mullet-headed Hillary Swank and Beck's brother-in-law and tortured soul Giovanni Ribisi

5 Reasons To See THE GIFT:

#1 Hilary Swank's mullet.
#2 Katie Holmes is topless and dead. (Stacie Ponder says, "Katie's body is BANGIN' but from the neck up she can take a hike." How much do we all LOVE Stacie!?!?!)
#3 An elderly man's naval tattoo
#4 The awesome soccer-ball lamp in the Cate's kid's bedroom.
#5 Cate checks out a crime scene at night in a thunder storm because that's the ideal time to look for clues.

THE GIFT